Things I Know

Thinking a lot about how life keeps on moving - I know I am still hung up on time. It is so interesting to think about though.
I am very fortunate, I have 3 friends that I would trust my life to. I mean if we were in a really bad situation I think we would all do our best to help each other out of it. That is something that a lot of people don't have.
So when I get uncomfortable with the things that I think should have happened in my life and didn't it is good for me to think on that.
What are the things that make me uncomfortable, that I think should have happened... or not happened in my life? Here is my list:
1. I should not have had to go through a divorce. It wasn't my plan when I said,"I do". My advice - don't live in a fog when you are young and think that everyone is thinking like you and has a healthy outlook on life; even when they talk like they do. If you do that you just might wake up on the first day of your honeymoon and say, "Oh my God what have I done?" But I didn't bail, I really tried and prayed and fasted.
2. I shouldn't have ever had a man look me in the eye and say, "you make too much money" - especially when it was when I was investing my life in the lives of families with young children. And especially because I don't have any retirement or own a home, etc. And especially when he was being paid probably almost 4 times what I was making at the time. (at least that is what someone said to me after they heard him say that to me.) His job? - pushing numbers around spreadsheets. Outcome in my life: that's proof - we live in a broken world.
3. The rest of my list is really to private to share here - so sorry.

Here is my list of the things I love that have happened in my life:
1. I made it this far and am happy and full of peace.
2. Ya, I am still proud of my kids. Speaking of which, if you are a mom whose kids are out of the house... you should watch Diane Keaton in "Because I Said So". I don't like the fact that her kids seem to be encouraged to sleep around, but there is one scene on her birthday where she is absolutely spot on in describing what it is like to be a mother whose kids are grown and what moms are supposed to do now. It is hilariously true.
3. I have been given a cool sister and despite our differences in life and lifestyle we really love each other and help each other - and like she said last week when we were saying good-bye on the phone: "when i started talking to you my back was really hurting and now I guess some good endorphiens were released while we were talking cause my back feels so much better!" Now that's cool and makes me think... I hope I have that effect on a lot of people, as opposed to being a pain in the behind!
4. I have discovered that I really like color, even more than I realized. And light. and the beach. and the mountains. And most of all. that I get to go and experience all those things most anytime I feel like it. I am so blessed to live here.
5. I have had many careers. And I have loved them all. Department Store Buyer, Caterer and Baker, Mother, Teacher, founder and director of a Christian preschool, and now managing volunteers for an international organization that cares about the people of the world that don't have even safe water, sanitation, effective hygiene or the knowledge of Jesus love. Which one did/do I love the most? Absolutely impossible to tell you. I do know that the ones I used to do I don't desire to do now... except baking, I love baking bread. But I don't because bread is fattening and I like to eat it.... while it's still HOT with real butter.
6. I have truly loved a few times, unfortunately they weren't capable of that too. But I have still loved truly and honestly and that makes me glad.

I hope your list like this one is long.